Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
