I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
