I have demons in me.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize