I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
