im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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