I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize