So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
