So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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