i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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