So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
