Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
