What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
