You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
