i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
