Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
