I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize