Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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