you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
