I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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