I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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