She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Randomize
