There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
