PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
