last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
