I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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