I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
