yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
