It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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