ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
