dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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