Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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