I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
