Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
