Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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