Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
He passed out mid-signature
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
