ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
