I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Randomize
