I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
