Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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