Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
