I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You were trust falling into bushes
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
