I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
