we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
