my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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