dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
