why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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