he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
