I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Randomize
