He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Someone shattered a urinal.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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