I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
